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 The resident expert thread

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DGAF
SomeMexicanGuy
sPurMiN_gErMin
bat
VILE
RoninHo'in
Skreshavik
Fido
CptnShotgun
DTECH
14 posters
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DTECH
Master of Facts, Factual Evidence, and Facts
DTECH


Posts : 4541
Points : 4745
Reputation : -115
Join date : 2010-03-19
Location : Here

The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:02 pm

Have a question? Ask anyone of our resident experts in this thread, they will be glad to help

Experts and their field of Knowledge

DTECH

How to corral a wily sheep
Car questions
How to look good and smash bitches
How to be funny
How to own a gun and never use it to protect yourself (in Canada only see other experts for MERIKA)
CANADUS expert
*NEW* iPhone expert

Honin

How to make a tin foil hat by knitting it
How to avoid being snooped on by the FBI
How to threaten someone with death while vacuuming
How to be a faggot
MERIKA expert

gut

How to be a perfect redneck
How to be an easy taget for home invasions or burglaries (mostly specializing in home burglaries)
Not him directly but his Father works for IBM and helped build Watson
How to mooch off the Government twice in 2 years (MERIKA only)
How to properly use HERP DERP
How to rock a mullet while claiming its one of those new cool fashion forward versions of it (meanwhile you have had it since birth)
MERIKA expert

PeckerChecker (Amp)

How to know famous cripples and name drop them
How to observe other males penises without being detected
How to steal thread ideas from more cooler and handsome looking experts
How to make the perfect grammarz
How to build the ultimate ricer
How to be a rich kid
*NEW* Faggy tween musician expert

Screech

How to work at McDs and still weigh the same as a 12 yr old girl
How to cut a hole in a furry suit for maximum pleasure
Gun questions
How to put your drunken mother to bed without waking her
How to be an edgy chan faggot
MERIKA expert

Gnarly

How to say everything is great/amazing/awesome
How to ball wash
How to always talk like a used car salesman while never having ever been one
How to post a boring thread
How to eat a cake made of shit yet still say it tastes great (also refer to item 1 How to say everything is great/amazing/awesome)

Emo (Fido)

How to get tight black jeans on sale from Target any time of the year
How to drive a Subaru while dressed emoish
How to post while drunk
How to always fuck with PeckerChecker
How to always be second fiddle in video game montages
How to always be right in any trendy argument or an argument that no one cares about
BELGIUM expert

Paddy (VILE)

How to battle a gut or another version of a redneck
How to find the end of the rainbow
How to install CCTVs
How to hate immigrants without making it appear racist
PIKEY expert

Nazi (Backdraft/Pink)

How to hate Jews
How to kill Jews
How to blame everything on Jews
How to deny the Holocaust
How to fit 10000 Jews in a car
How to be a Kraut
How to post the same meme pics over and over again
What color of Lederhosen to wear for a beach wedding
GERMANIUM expert

Fergie (Alyss)

How to groom young children
How to write shitty plays that seem edgy but are really boring shit
How to save every single picture you see on forums so that one day you can make fake FB accounts with them
How to be a white Japanese
How to be a woman
How to be a ginger (not many questions for this though since no one wants to be a ginger)
How to be an edgy chan faggot
UK fag (see below for further explanation)

Shitnun

How to try out for a new part in a movie about a guy that rings a bell in Notre Dame
General drug prescription questions
How to be an edgy chan faggot
How to do wheelies in a wheelchair
UK fag (no one is an expert on UK since they are insignificant)

Spacecocks

How to always have people write you off as a retard
How to skirt incest laws in the state of Florida
How to be a meme
How to get beaten up with dignity (or lack there of)
How to be the biggest faggot on any forum
*NEW* How to avoid tightening up when an alien inserts a probe into your anal cavity

Skylar/Skyler/Faggy girl name

How to be not well liked
How to milk your parents for money
How to be put on ignore
How to make threads about being a drug addled user/loser
How to make 88 PSNs before the age of 13
*NEW* Received a degree from Harvard in tryhardedness
*NEW* Expert at being a jealous cock rider, addendum: with less expertise but with vast amounts of real word experience in deep throating smegma covered cocks


Last edited by DTECH on Sun Mar 18, 2012 12:03 am; edited 8 times in total
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CptnShotgun
Eezo junkie
CptnShotgun


Posts : 2382
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Location : Cyborg Docking Station 4

The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:05 pm

I think Skresh and Alyss should be added to "How to be an edgy chan faggot", I'm not the only frequenter of the chans.

I did laugh though, a lot.


Last edited by CptnShotgun on Fri Mar 16, 2012 1:09 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Fido
emo
Fido


Posts : 5465
Points : 5955
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Join date : 2010-04-18

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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:06 pm

LOL. Seriously. Awesome.
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Skreshavik
Mordekaiser
Skreshavik


Posts : 5997
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Age : 34
Location : California/Oregon

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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:07 pm

I'm laughing so hard right now. Also, you forgot to add into the emo category:
"How to always be right in any trendy argument."
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RoninHo'in
Paranoid Vet
Paranoid Vet
RoninHo'in


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Age : 42
Location : Cali baby

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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:12 pm

You forgot our Nazi's Lederhosen....

I fix'd it for you already tho Cool
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Fido
emo
Fido


Posts : 5465
Points : 5955
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:13 pm

Not just any trendy argument, ANY argument.
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DTECH
Master of Facts, Factual Evidence, and Facts
DTECH


Posts : 4541
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Join date : 2010-03-19
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:15 pm

Excellent suggestions everyone, I shall make the necessary changes, Id like for this to be as complete as possible in case anyone does want to know stuff

I think this has the possibility of being the next WolframAlpha..... I should make this an app
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DTECH
Master of Facts, Factual Evidence, and Facts
DTECH


Posts : 4541
Points : 4745
Reputation : -115
Join date : 2010-03-19
Location : Here

The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:16 pm

RoninHo'in wrote:
You forgot our Nazi's Lederhosen....

I fix'd it for you already tho Cool

Good catch I missed that
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Skreshavik
Mordekaiser
Skreshavik


Posts : 5997
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Age : 34
Location : California/Oregon

The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:16 pm

Fido wrote:
Not just any trendy argument, ANY argument.
Hah, touche.
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Fido
emo
Fido


Posts : 5465
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:17 pm

I can answer about Iran/Israel as well if you want me to.
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RoninHo'in
Paranoid Vet
Paranoid Vet
RoninHo'in


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:18 pm

^Insignificant... this list is only for subject matter that is worth a damn
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DTECH
Master of Facts, Factual Evidence, and Facts
DTECH


Posts : 4541
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Join date : 2010-03-19
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The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:18 pm

RoninHo'in wrote:
You forgot our Nazi's Lederhosen....

I fix'd it for you already tho Cool

Actually I fixed your fix
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VILE
God Damn Mother Fucking VILE
VILE


Posts : 2847
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:23 pm

Add 'how to make awesome threads' to your own list sir.
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VILE
God Damn Mother Fucking VILE
VILE


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:24 pm

...And then schedule a consultation with Amp
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DTECH
Master of Facts, Factual Evidence, and Facts
DTECH


Posts : 4541
Points : 4745
Reputation : -115
Join date : 2010-03-19
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The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:26 pm

VILE wrote:
Add 'how to make awesome threads' to your own list sir.

It would be a little more specialized then that though

How to make awesome threads while layed up in bed with a gimp foot (however always defer to Shitnun for gimp expertise)
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bat
Gutman with a gat
bat


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:54 pm

DTECH wrote:

gut

How to make dick jokes

How to sling heavy shit around

Such as cannons, like, how to just sling a massive civil war cannon on your shoulder and walk around with it

How to punch through 18 inches of solid steele/kevlar mesh and rip out the trillion volt wiring on the other side

How to put a crater on the moon

How to snatch the engine out of a passing automobile

How to launch exploding fireballs out of the palm of your hands using karate

How to sustain yourself indefinitely in the wilderness by eating only your own fingernails

How to open a trans-dimensional wormhole with your fist

How to defeat Wanton

How to speak fake russian

MERIKA expert

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sPurMiN_gErMin
Lederhosen
sPurMiN_gErMin


Posts : 635
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Join date : 2010-04-22
Location : in your bush

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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 1:58 pm

I bow down to you...

Excellent work...

But one fix...I do NOT deny the holocaust. I cheer for it.

Thanks.
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Skreshavik
Mordekaiser
Skreshavik


Posts : 5997
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:03 pm

Yea, I think that's an Islamic thing.
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SomeMexicanGuy
TL;DR
SomeMexicanGuy


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:26 pm

Sad
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RoninHo'in
Paranoid Vet
Paranoid Vet
RoninHo'in


Posts : 8157
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Age : 42
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:35 pm

SomeMexicanGuy wrote:
Sad

Oh shit, you forgot someone D....


Mexican't:
How to sustain yourself on nothing but beans
???
How to live in a dust bowl without ever realizing paradise is only 2 hours away
How to pick fruit
How to turk der jerbs
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Skreshavik
Mordekaiser
Skreshavik


Posts : 5997
Points : 6336
Reputation : 55
Join date : 2010-04-30
Age : 34
Location : California/Oregon

The resident expert thread Empty
PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:43 pm

How to apply for welfare and never pay taxes.
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bat
Gutman with a gat
bat


Posts : 5334
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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:52 pm

how to tldr
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SomeMexicanGuy
TL;DR
SomeMexicanGuy


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 2:59 pm

Very Happy
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SomeMexicanGuy
TL;DR
SomeMexicanGuy


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 3:02 pm

RoninHo'in wrote:
SomeMexicanGuy wrote:
Sad

Oh shit, you forgot someone D....


Mexican't:
How to sustain yourself on nothing but beans
???
How to live in a dust bowl without ever realizing paradise is only 2 hours away
How to pick fruit
How to turk der jerbs
I just went to the Bay for my first time this past weekend, it was awesome. Everyone was chill as fuck and I didn't even have to worry about being high anywhere. Smoked a couple blunts and took some hits out of a bong and went to the grocery store with my eyes so fucking red. Then I went to Fisherman's Wharf and saw Alcatraz, also happened to be waiting for the Muni when I saw a bunch of naked people riding bikes down the street lol.
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DGAF
Homosexual male
DGAF


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PostSubject: Re: The resident expert thread   The resident expert thread Icon_minitimeFri Mar 16, 2012 3:05 pm

DTECH wrote:

DTECH

The resident expert thread Dtech-10


thats better
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